A Gift

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Year 0
You were there when I got home. Mom and Dad doted on me but you weren't jealous. You were no longer the brand new thing but envy took no hold on your toddler heart. You loved the pink lizardy-looking thing that I was, even though I did nothing but sleep and cry.

For that acceptance,
I thank you.

Year 5
Mom and Dad were always working, trying their absolute best to let us live in luxury. Our maids changed almost religiously. Playmates are few and far in between. You were the only constant that anchored me and Baby. You were the one who taught us new tricks and games. You were the one who took care of us, emotionally if not physically. You were the judge of the petty quarrels between me and Baby and you were the one who berated me for my wrongdoings.

For that responsibility,
I honor you.

Year 10
We drifted apart. I was a nerd/geek. You were the popular one. You had your friends, I had mine. We liked none of the same thing. We quarrel, we fight. But then, you were always blasting and singing to Backstreet Boys and Spice Girls. You introduced me to Boyzone. You brought music into my ears, my life, my soul. Life as I knew it changed forever.

For that change,
I praise you.

Year 15
We drifted even further. I hated you. I hated the fact that everyone refers to me as your brother. I wanted recognition; I wanted life to call my own. Friends that I know for so long left for their education. I was alone. I was hateful. And what did you do? You accepted me as who I am. You listened to my rants and views. You gave the right compliments, you corrected my mistakes. You made me feel good about myself.

For that sense of self-worth,
I adore you.

Year 20
We're so far apart. Thousands of people, hundreds of cities, a whole world stood between us. We meet for a measly two months a year. None of my friends, none of my colleagues, none of them or all of them put together tried harder than you to keep me in their life, to let me know that there was someone who loved me. At times, you didn't know what I was going through but you stood by me nonetheless.

For that loyalty,
I hold you high.

Year 23
You're 24. You're getting married. I know you'll try to keep things as they are but you and I both know things are going to change forever. I hate this. I wish you won't leave me. I wish that we'll stay 5 forever. I wish we could still play kejar-kejar and masak-masak and do nothing but revel in each other's company forever. I hate Him for taking you away. I envy Him for being able to spend his life with you. I love Him for making you happy. Walking forward with a blindfold on, I feel a hand clasping mine. I know instantly that it's yours.

For turning my tears into laughter,
For shaping me into who I am,
For being you,
I love you.

Happy 24th, Ka'a