So Random You'll Scratch Your Head

I do my best writing when I'm plagued with emotions. At least, that's what I feel. And this time, the metaphorical Egyptians is pissing off the metaphorical Omnipotent One. Which reminds me of a chart I saw showing the amount of people, whose death are caused by Satan [somewhere around 10] and the amount that was caused by God [It literally went off the chart] in the Bible. That's the problem with believing in a Good God, I think, instead of a God that is high above such human terms as good and evil.

But I digress. Well, not really. This blog is about bits and pieces. A jumbled up glandular emotion shit that can be described by the Master of Subtle Subject Changing, "people tend to glean over the whole 'i'm a complex human being bit'"

Actually, that quote doesn't make any sense to the context but hey ho let's go, it's a new day.

Oh, and before I forget, Happy Zombie Jesus Day.

A friend of mine, whom I've not met for more than 4 years, was reluctant to meet up with me because of his memories of me bullying him. I was shocked, to put it mildly. Here I was, pitying myself, feeling that I was hated and/or insignificant in the whole 2 years of Upper High School and somebody thought, maybe even is still thinking, of me as a bully. Self pity is an evil thing, children. The worst thing was that I had so much good memories with this particular friend but the fact of the matter is that he simply isn't having the same perspective. Freaky.

Another friend of mine sent me an SMS a month or two back, writing in admiration of me not-giving-crap of what people think. Again, shock. I thought I was thinking too much of people's opinions. If I was the person that I want to be, a LOT of people are going to be pissed with me, here in Volgograd. Oh, alright, they'll be MORE pissed with me than they already are.

I'm tired of being fake. I'm tired of smiling, when I wanna say, "You know what, dear? Fuck off." I'm tired of avoiding conflicts. I'm tired, I'm tired, I'm tired. My kind of Heaven: Being able to say anything without consequences.

Friends of mine from South Asia are super sensitive of what people'd say about their parents. It's sweet... and annoying as hell. You don't want people to ask, "Didn't your parents teach you something or another?", then don't do fucked up things. Some people I know here are ridiculously selfish. You are at that age, where everything you do still reflects your upbringing. So stop fucking up, worthless pieces of shit.

I'm tired of doing my end of things and people procrastinating, if at all, with their own parts. In relationships, in home works, in getting signatures... Do unto others what thou wanst to be done unto thee. WTF do I procrastinate with other people's things that much?

I'm falling in love with Volgograd. As a general population, I hate the Malaysians here but I'm in love with the City/Town/Backwater Kampung.

It's been very long since I posted a wall of text. No pictures or videos on this one. Not like people care if I spend hours looking for the perfect picture for a post, right? Oh well.

Song for the moment

Got a new PC and feel like people think I'm so damn rich and feel quite guilty for asking my mom for it but then again, without it, I don't know how I was going to survive. Don't feel like blogging. Here's the song for the moment:

Color blind iz da shiznit

Since I don't have a pc yet, I can't spend hours on an entry like I usually do. Instead, I'm gonna post videos. Watch 'em, you idiots.

Despair not!

For I have seen a vision, and yea, it is a vision of hope and prosperity and general goodness. I have seen that soon it shall rise again, it shall continue its glorious mediocrity. This blog shall rise again!

For the meantime, here's Mr. Izzard:

Johan Ariff bin Juhari will be out of business indefinitely

Kau janji cintaku tahun beribu,
Kau janji akan hilangkan duka pilu,
Katamu cinta tak mengenal siapa,
Katamu cinta tak mengenal mengapa...

Ku berikan segala qudratku,
Ku inginkan hanya bersamamu,
Tidak ku sangka akan erti sebenarnya,
Hatiku kau pijak, kau cerca, kau hina...

Kerna penipuanmu ku anggap cinta,
Di sini diriku ditinggal merana,
Oh komputer, kau memang tak guna,
Nak on pun sudah tidak dapat jua!

Babimotherfuckersonofabitc

hfuckingidiotsnobbishretardeddownsyndromepigcopulaternosepickerflamingsoreofmygenitaliapuslickingimbecilewhoshoulddiebutdeathistoogoodatreatmentforyouasssniffingtoelickingbastardofincestuousdamnedhillybilliesjamiroquai punya komputer. Sekarang kau mati! Habis 2 bulan nih aku nak buat apa??? Haih...

So basically, computer rosak d. Will be onlining using others' pc minimally. This blog is practically gonna die.

Thanks

THANKS

The best post I've read anywhere for quite a while.

Self Image

I sometimes feel like such a douche. Like right now, I'm listening to Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake Waltz. I question my enjoyment of it. Does every drum beat move me or do I have it in my collection because that's what people of taste have?

I've read some heavy stuff, comparatively. Take Plato's Lysis for example. Did I read it because I was curious on Plato's thoughts on friendship or so that I can tell people I've read Plato?

English as a language. Do I correct people wen dey tok lik dis because I can't stand it or is it because I want to show people that my English, at least in written form, is better than average?

In every situation the former and the latter arguments have it merit, or so it seems to me.

What do you think?