Taxidermy

I've always liked taxidermy animals. Whether you killed it or just bought it, stuffed animals always bring class into any room. Well, maybe not the dining room. An office or a study, definitely. 

I mean, what says power more than a standing bear behind your desk when an employee enters to ask for a raise?

My mum-side grandpa had a stuffed bird-of-paradise of the Paradisaea minor species. Malays call it Cenderawasih. I remember the legend that the male of the Cenderawasih clan was proud and asked the Rainbow God or something to make him beautiful despite discouragement from his wife. So, the God granted his wish and he got to be beautiful. The story ended with men hunting the male of the species down for their feathers, wtf. Apparently, all races at one time or another believed that the bird of paradise descended from... wait, you'll never guess it... paradise because of its vibrant plumage. 

When he passed on, my mother inherited the bird. Oh, yeah!

I thought the Cenderawasih is a protected species, if not an endangered one. Turns out, according to wikipedia, it fell into the the least concerned groups. Grab your hunting caps, people.

On a seemingly unrelated note, I've always been fascinated by mythological creatures also. The more famous dragons and griffins entrance me as bad as the lesser known hippocampi and kappas. 

Today, instead of studying and preparing for Friday's exam, I discovered Rogue Taxidermy. Apparently, it's a branch of taxidermy dealing with mix-n-match-ing animal parts. Thus, my cryptozoology and preserved animal interests are united! Just look at these beauts. 

Black griffins are so cool.

Some of you might wonder on the familiarity of this animal. It's the Capricorn.

Wizard of Oz allusion, ftw! This is actually the most expensive of the priced works in the fantasy section.

All the work of Ms Sarina Brewer of Custom Creature Taxidermy.com. The figures I've shown you cost  from USD $1500 to $3500 'and up'. If there's a reader out there who wants to show their appreciation to me by giving me these as gifts... well, in the Malay culture, you shouldn't not receive a gift, any gift at all. 

Lutfi said that when I die, he'd taxidermize me into a centaur and I'll "finally have the horse-size penis you've always wanted."

...

I have weird friends

Johan's Controversial Post for the Next Few Months

By kakashi101. I like the photo, not the caption

Now, generally speaking, all religions nowadays forgot the Let-There-Be-Peace in the core of each of them. We preach hellfire and brimstone. 

The all-friendly Pentecostal slips their fact that ‘if you don’t accept the sovereignty of Jesus H. Christ you’ll burn in Hell’ into every religious conversation. Even Buddhists are falling to that greatest sin: Pride. Yes, some Buddhists I know look down on non-Buddhists and laugh at the eventual incarnation of these non-practitioners into animals or plants or even minerals. 

The teaching of Muslims these days… The media shows a lot already and from my experience, those ‘slanders’ have more than kernels of truth.

Now, before you scream and shout, I am saying the teachings of Guru Nanak and Jesus and Muhammad and the Buddha and Zoroaster all preach nothing but goodness. I’m saying the preaching of the followers is generally fucked up. 

We forgot about the number of time Jesus spoke of love compared to damnation. We forgot that the Buddha taught us the release of self and the ultimate unity. We forgot the Quran’s tolerance of even the worshippers of stars. We forgot how our forefathers used war as it is said in the Torah and their fate. We forgot. 

Now, there’s a patriotic war going on the Holy land. But again, we forgot. It’s a patriotic war. There’s no war waged against Islam or Judaism. There’s a war between Palestine and Israel. I am against wars. I am against the atrocities they bring. I am against the death of innocents. 

I am also against the manipulation of the name of religion in wars. This act, used not only by both sides, even third parties are using it, only smears the name of each religion. Jews won’t rest until all Muslims are dead. Islam is the prophesied anti-Christ that brings war and destruction. These are the perception we’re making for ourselves. The followers of Elijah and the Four Caliphs are doing this.

Now, some may criticize me why do I want to protect a religion that is not my own. I’ll tell you why. Most of you are either Muslims or have enough contact with Muslims to know the basic teaching of Islam. As Malaysians, we have very limited contact with Jews and Judaism. And as Malays, the only thing we know about Jews is the propaganda we learnt in school. 

Now, the regime that rules in Israel is a Zionist regime. What is the Zionist regime? Zion is the land God promised to the Jews. Zionists are those who believe that they have a God-given right to the land of Israel and therefore it is okay for them to occupy it. 

Now, Orthodox Judaism and some other sects that consider the literal aspect, as well as the metaphorical, of the Talmud and the Torah strongly oppose to the creation of a Zionist state. This is because they believe that the Messiah should herald the creation of the Jewish state not the other way round; or they are opposed to the idea that Zion HAS to have a majority of Jews. 

You can see at peace rallies in the western world people in their full Hasidic regalia, that is to say white men in black hat, black clothes and black beard, protesting against the injustice done to the Palestinians. The International Solidarity Movement was co-founded by a Jew. There are Jews-exclusive organizations such as Jews for Israeli-Palestinian Peace, Jews for Justice for Palestinians; let alone the Jew-Muslim organizations. 

Yet what we hear now are the following:
“Ya Allah, destroy Israel/the Jews.”
“In the Torah it is said that Jews must kill Muslims.”
“It’s their nature as prophet-killers.”
“Theirs is a damned race.”

However you translate the Quran, you have to remember this: it was written that God condemned them for their actions ~ it might be all the Jews or just the Jews who committed the act ~ but it was GOD who damned them. God didn’t give you the right to damn them; God didn’t give you the authorization to demonize them. 

Now, here we are touting Islam as the religion of peace and brotherhood while during prayers we ask for the destruction of a whole nation, or even race. It’s one thing to ask God for peace. It’s a whole different story to instruct God how to achieve peace. 

I advocate you to pray for the salvation of the Palestinians, not the destruction of the Israelis. No matter what creed or system of belief that you have, pray for their liberation. Do not pray for destruction. I’ve never heard of a reliable Hadith of when the Prophet prayed for destruction. Muslims believe that Muhammad is as perfect as a man can be. Muhammad himself didn’t deem himself worthy to ask for destruction, what makes us more special?

It’s not the same thing, asking for the decimation of the Israelis or even the Israeli government and the safekeeping of the Palestinians. Who are we to assign which party is guilty?

Remember one of the Hadith Qudsi, which is a Hadith where Muhammad quotes directly from God, “When God decreed the Creation He pledged Himself by writing in His book which is laid down with Him: 'My mercy prevails over my wrath.'”

P.S. Yes, the IDF has killed more Palestinians than the other way round but, to quote Tevye from Fiddler on the Roof, "If you demand an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, the whole world would go blind and be toothless."

P.P.S. There seems to be a LOT of Nows.

Johan Ariff bin Juhari is Darkwing Duck

Let's.

Get.

Dangerous.

 

I really should be studying.

Nostalgia

Image by Undercadence

It was 3am. I had no instant noodle. Hungry like a Hungry Hungry Hippo. Foodstuff all frozen. Except for the last two eggs in a carton. Lapaq punya pasal...

The taste of mashed hard-boiled eggs with a little bit of kicap pekat masin brought me instantly ten, twelve years back. You know, those times when you want to go with your parents to a boring wedding JUST because they won't bring you? Everytime my mom came back from one of these weddings, she'd bring back the bunga telurs, a Hindu custom quietly surviving into today's orthodox Malay Islam. So, what we did back then was attack the eggs with forks in a bowl and add a touch of kicap masin, not too much till we taste nothing BUT kicap but not too little that we wouldn't taste the kicap. Just enough for the kicap taste give accent to the creamy yolk. At 3am, I thought of that.

Yesterday, I made Milo in a big mug. Too much water, too little sweetened condensed milk, the end result was a quite bland tasting concoction of malt beverage. If my life's a movie, there'd be a swoosh sound before a scene showing a scene where my mom asks the maid to dilute the Milo with cold water because the thing was too sweet. 

Funny thing, nostalgia. Try as you might, you can't remember small details like these. But listening to some white kid squealing can bring you memories you've forgotten ever existed. 

I have Stockholm Syndrome and Here's Your Letter

You know what's fucked up? I mean, really REALLY fucked up? I'm not depressed but I feel like I should be, wtf. At least, I don't think that I'm depressed. No, I feel more of a bottled-up emotions though I don't know what the emotion is, you know? 

0% sense - check

And what is the contemporary anthem album for depression/anger/bad thoughts? Why, Blink-182 last album, of course! Not that you need to be emo to enjoy it but you know when you're depressed/angry/having evil thoughts and you don't want people to console you? You know it's not good but you want to be consumed by the anger/depression/malicious thoughts [from now on I'll refer it as Puppy with a capital P because I can]

You're Puppy-ed. There's something going on in your chest only a bout of Puppy could bring, warm but not comforting. It might be emotions or adrenaline or something but you know it. You don't actually like the feeling enough to sought it out all the time but right here, right now, with this Puppy you're having, it's invigorating. 

You jeling to your loved one consoling you. At that precise moment, no matter how much you care for that person, you want him/her to fuck off. Or better yet, you muse how it'd feel hurting that cared person.  You're not big enough of an asshole to actually do that but the Puppy's just doing it's job. 

You want to lash out. You want to shout. You want to let the world feel what you feel: Puppy. 

Right? You know what I'm talking about now? Well, I have that uncomfortable warm thing in my chest but none of the Puppy. Koyaanisqatsi, anyone? Incidentally, I torrented the movie and still haven't watched it. 

So, returning to the point, two songs out of the album: Stockholme Syndrome and Here's Your Letter.

Stockholm Syndrome is a psychological state of mind described as concern or even affection towards the kidnapper by the kidnappee. 

The monologue in the beginning is actually a letter written by the bassist Mark Hoppus' grandmother to his grandfather sometime during the war. The actual song itself is classic Blink. The raging Tom and the depressed given up Mark weave the lyrics while Travis just rock the drums. Dude, is there any better drummer than Travis Barker? Ever? The sheer speed is enough to rattle your core.

Heres Your Letter - blink-182

Now, this one is an example of what's going on in the last album. While Mark was writing the lyrics, Tom was working on a chorus for another song. According to Mark, 'This song is about people's inability to communicate with one another and how words and explanations only confuse the issue.'. Right. I like the lyrics, listen closely.

Ok, this session of self-distracting is over. I'll return to my efforts to start studying for today. Wish me luck.

Random thoughts

Have you ever tried to do the right thing and people taunt you for it, not realizing it's the right thing? And you grind your teeth and look calm skindeep when actually, behind the layer of derma and muscle and fat, you're raging, almost willing to screw the right thing and bite the taunt-er's head off? I do that at least 3 days a week. 

Sometimes I wonder if I'm building pent-up emotions and will eventually go on a killing spree.

Is it okay for someone you know for the better part of four years to be heard saying sorry only 3 times? And twice with enough sarcasm put inside, it could kill a monkey?

Why do people say the Jonas Brothers have talent when they sing through their nose? It's like that lady from the Nanny or Janice from Friends singing.

Would you believe me if I tell you that I censor myself in my blog and in public? Not on the people stuff but on stuff that matters: the spiritual, political and other -al stuff.

I remember the days when Snuff videos are actually rare. Nowadays, you google snuff you get snuff. Any twelve year-old can do it. It's rather worrying, actually. The internet is being the Herr Dussander to many Todd Bowdens.

Why don't people believe me when I say I'm shy?

Why people try to get me to say that, actually, I do care about and want to help the people when I tell them my motivation for pursuing medicine is mainly for the money?

My thoughts right now is me wanting to figure out how to post this entry upside down. And reading the comments of my only 2 readers reprimanding me for that.

If I get a genie one of my wishes is that every week I get a day where there would be no consequences to my actions.

I dream of the day when some of my hands-on friends and acquaintances, i.e. those that I have for the better part of the year, are not Philistines.

Duck on a stick.

Johan Ariff bin Juhari is so stressed about his exams that it's not even funny anymore

Refer to title